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New Poetry: Zirconium Tears

Zirconium Tears

tear_drop
The rain clouds the tears
As the test begins anew.
Sincerity crosses over eyes,
But crossed eyed views
Hold longer still.

Void in the heart
As the pain breaks like
Waves cresting in the night
Ocean. And all I can do
Is watch.

Once again, strength was
Tossed onto another’s shoulder
Only to be bucked off
Leaving you alone
And afraid.

Broken promises kept
Me coming back to this moment
As I watch those crystals form
Under your eyes.
The dark lies.

The numbness that spreads
Has tried to creep into
My own heart, and it nearly
Took root. But I chose to
Hold it back.

I will not be numb
Like you. I will not
Let Zirconium tears fall
From my eyes and run down
My face.

I Trusted You
Echoed through my ears
As you walked away.
Only then did I realize
You never did.

– J.L. Martin –

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Posted by on July 23, 2013 in Art, Blog, Poetry

 

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PODCAST: The Devil’s Advocates – Episode 6 NOW AVAILABLE!

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Six episodes in and we finally come to the conclusion of our first major debate! Listen to how Mike the Barber deals with the idea of the Government cracking down and taking his guns while Ben tries to play Devil’s Advocate. Enjoy the antics of Chris The Sleepy as he struggles to stay up past his bedtime to help us bring this discussion to an end!
This episode contains:

  • Government Plans To Take Yer Gurns
  • Why Musket Wounds Are Bad
  • Chris The Sleepy Talking For More Than 3 Words!
  • Lessons On The Federalist Papers
  • And How We Are All Screwed In An Armed Revolt

Also, please LIKE US on our Facebook Page! Every Like brings you one step closer to eternal happiness. Well, at least if you believe in an afterlife that you get rewarded in. If not, well then you have nothing to lose so LIKE IT ANYWAYS!

Enjoy The Devil’s Advocates Today!


 
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Posted by on July 23, 2013 in Blog, Podcast

 

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I have been awarded! (Time to share the love)

Once again, the blogging community here has continued to uplift me and make me realize that there are some very awesome and supportive people out there.

Special thanks go to Belsbror for nominating me for these two awards, please check out their Blog right now!:

Loyal Reader Award

Loyal Reader Award

Wonderful Team Membership Award

Wonderful Team Membership Award

To the Nominated…
For these rewards there are a few rules:

For the Loyal Reader Award:

  1. Display the award on your blog.
  2. Thank the person who sent it to you.
  3. Answer a rhetorical question of the authors choosing.
  4. Send on the award to everyone you consider a loyal reader.

The question: If Google were to disappear, how would we ever know?

For the Wonderful Team Membership Award:

  1. Display the logo on a post.
  2. Link back to the person who nominated you.
  3. Nominate 14 readers other bloggers and inform them via comment in their blog sites.

My Nominees For Both Awards:

  1. Poetry By Skull
  2. Doncharisma
  3. Little Birds Dad
  4. ValerieDavies
  5. Shawn L Bird
  6. Poetreecreations.org
  7. CatrionaisCrazy
  8. SophieBrowns
  9. Daily(W)rite
  10. MindRetrofit7
  11. LinkSavesZelda
  12. The Dimwit Diary
  13. The Blog Of Funny Names
  14. 18 Years Young

Please check out these 14 Bloggers and let them know what you think of their stuff!

 
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Posted by on July 22, 2013 in Blog

 

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Weekend Shout-Out!

Hello everyone!

This weeks random shout out goes to a fellow blogger, Belsbror!

This blogger was one of the first to start visiting my own page when I signed up here about a month ago.

They have been very supportive to nearly all of the random posts I have added over the last few weeks and I really do appreciate it!

If you enjoy creative writing and interesting opinions, please visit their blog at: Belsbror.wordpress.com


Starting Monday, I will be attempting to expand my list of “Affiliates”.

I will be looking for like minded souls in the avenues of Creative Writing, Podcasting, and generally spreading odd ideas.

If you are interested in joining my, hopefully soon to be, expanding circle of influence, please let me know. I will put a direct link to your blog on my side bar. The only thing I ask is that you do the same on your own!.

ALSO, A note from my co-host of The Devil’s Advocates:

Want to advertise with us for free? It’s easy!

Look, I’ll level with you- we have hundreds of listeners, not thousands. But this is free, so WTF just do it! Here’s all you need to do to advertise for free:

  • Like our Facebook page (Click here to visit our page)
  • Share any one post from The Devil’s Advocates with your friends
  • Tell us what you’re advertising and why people should check it out! Just put it as a comment on our Free Advertising post on our Facebook page, we’ll take care of the rest!

That’s it! We’ll get back to you on Facebook regarding which episode we’ll mention (advertise) your product/service on… plus everyone will see your comment on our page. We’ll even check it out, if we like it we’ll post about it too! This is all free, why the hell wouldn’t you do this? What are you, some sort of commie bastard?

Do you really like our podcast, and want EVEN MORE free advertising?We’re happy to help out our “Friends of the Show.” We have a permanent side menu on our Devil’s Advocates website with links to those who support the show. All we look for is some sort of reciprocal action, such as a link to us on your site, or a plug for us on your podcast, or something along those lines. Our website gets 4 times as much traffic as our podcast, so why not take advantage? Just contact Ben- Ben.Erling@facebook.com to get started. Again, it’s free. You should really do anything that’s free. Except maybe prostitutes, because if they’re free something weird is going on. Probably chlamydia.

 
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Posted by on July 21, 2013 in Blog, Podcast

 

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A Plea For Attention!

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The person that I co-host my podcast with just posted this on his Facebook page and I felt I needed to share it here. Normally he is not a “heartfelt” person, but this is one of the few projects that we have gotten involved with that we have actually put a lot of effort into.

As he says below, our humor is not for everyone, but if you do find time to give us a listen, please leave us a note or a rating. Every little bit helps!

And to everyone who has listened or thought about giving us a chance, thank you very much for your support!


A Message from my Co-Host Ben: (The Devil’s Advocates Podcast)
WARNING: LONG, HONEST HEARTFELT GROVELING POST AHEAD!

OK, I’m going to put this out there: getting a podcast off the ground (people besides your friends listening) is damn near impossible. There’s already too many podcasts, most of them suck, and no one wants to try a new one.

That said, our podcast, “The Devil’s Advocates,” is showing signs of growing beyond our friends. The numbers are actually rising, but I feel like we’re at that point where if we’re going to break through into something more than goofing around, this is when we need to really try.

I’m honestly, humbly and annoyingly begging all of you: if you haven’t given it a shot yet, please do. Start with episode 5, it’s quite amusing. If you enjoy it then please, PLEASE tell your friends or like the Facebook page or share a post or subscribe to it or something. Josh Martin and I have some good ideas and plans on the horizon on how to improve the show (more estrogen, local groups and guests, more and better microphones) and those things are coming soon, but a lot of our really good ideas require us to have a certain number of listeners to really make them happen.

When we started the podcast, our expectations were low, probably like our parents when we were born. Our meager goal was to start with around 10 listeners, because we’re losers, and grow a little bit each week. We thought if we could get to 50 listeners each week, that would be pretty cool… and if we could get to 100 listeners each week, we’d feel like this might really be something we want to do for the long haul. Let’s just say for now we’re feeling pretty cool, and we’re thinking it’s now realistic that we might soon know that we want to do this for a while.

Please give us a chance. I know our strange conversations and twisted humor are not for everyone, but I think we’re starting to get our footing with understanding what works and what doesn’t. I think you’ll see that in coming episodes, especially 7 and 8. I am humbly begging for your help, just give us a chance. Episodes are only 30 minutes. The feedback we have gotten from complete strangers indicates that we are getting better at it and that people are really enjoying it now. Thanks to Ross and Trousered Apes for their belief and help in this (check them out off the link on our site) and thanks to Michael for being one of our favorite polarizing guests… and please, if any of you want to ever come on or call in to the podcast for any reason… to promote, to disagree, or just to chat- it’s done. Just ask me. We’ll promote anything you want on the podcast and the website… and the website gets a ton of traffic.

If this podcast succeeds, I want it to be a victory that we all get to share. Not just me and Josh, but all of you guys for sticking with us and sharing it. If we ever grew to be something more than what it is now, you would all be a part of this community and you would help shape what the show becomes. That’s what I hope for, and I hope you’ll help us make it happen. Thank you to everyone who checked it out so far, I appreciate it more than I tell you.

I will now resume penis and vagina jokes.www.wearethedevilsadvocates.com/subscribe/

 
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Posted by on July 20, 2013 in Blog, Podcast

 

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New Book Cover Art

I have been taking a short break from writing and have begun working again on some new cover designs for a couple of my current projects.

This first one is for my nearly complete first draft: “Beyond The Black Door”
BookCover_BeyondTheBlackDoor

This second on is for a re-write I am doing of a halfway complete draft: “The Dark Light”
BookCover_TheDarkLightPlease let me know what you think!

 
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Posted by on July 20, 2013 in Art, Blog, Books

 

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New Poetry: Concerning Lost Faith

Concerning Lost Faith
An Open Letter To Robert Frost

Frost_image
My dearest friend, I must relate to you
This feeling that of utter gloom upon
The pages of your darkened witches brew.
Because of your craft, my faith is now gone.

You see, humanity has passed its course,
And your views on Universal Design
Has left me empty and without remorse;
Is it true that we can not be refined?

Your friend Trilling* once said of your inner
Thoughts, that you…you were a man of terror.
In youth these thoughts I could not decipher.
In age I hold your words to a mirror.

Of paths once taken, never to look back,
You took a hard road, and not one of horn.
It is not the mended walls that I lack!
Many a good neighbors have been born.

I write you now, to ask you this one thing.
To find the truth hidden deep in your head.
Was terror what you were trying to sing?
To put nightmares in those curled in their beds?

If this was the case, with me you had done
What you have aimed to do. Your words of fire
And ice have left me in a world far from
What I would hope for or ever desire.

– J.L. Martin –
(* Lionel Trilling was a critic who called Frost’s works “terrifying” at a birthday celebration of his)

 
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Posted by on July 18, 2013 in Blog, Poetry

 

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Chapter 2: The Dark Light

Hello avid readers!

Below is the second chapter to a book I have been working on on-and-off for the past ten years.

You can find chapter one HERE as well as the rest!

Enjoy!


Chapter 2

I think it was the ride up to our new future that I remember the clearest out of the last couple decades of memories. The way the sky seemed so blue and clear and so dark at the same time. If I had known then what I know now, I would have taken that sky for something ominous. Instead I looked at it as the dawning of a new beginning for me. It took us the better part of five days for my nice new dodge to climb its way up north. I spent most of that time keeping to myself, letting my mind wander on the road. It was easier to be scared and excited in silence rather than try to make meaningless conversation and I had a feeling that Mike felt the exact same. I hadn’t heard him utter a single word since we hopped on the main drag leading to the edge of town. It wasn’t a tense silence, it was a solemn one.

It had been two weeks since our numbers had been called, and we were expected to report to the army recruitment office over in Oklahoma City. That made our little adventure up north that much easier to accomplish considering everyone figured we were being good ol’ American boys heading over to serve our country in a war we barely even understood. There were old friends in the street waving to us as we passed, old folks sitting on their porches smiling with pride. Most of them had served in the first world war. Lying to them was more difficult than lying to our own parents. At least with our own folks it was easier to bare the looks of fear and sorrow they gave thinking their sons were going off to be killed in the middle of Germany. Knowing that we were going to be safe and sound hunkered down in a cave somewhere past the Yukon made that lie palatable. Of course we tried not to think about what would go through their minds when Uncle Same contacted them about our absence from the recruitment office.

No, it was the eyes of those old retired veterans that struck us the hardest and left us in silence for the first day of our trip. Their smiling bright faces filled with fear, joy, pride, and envy as if they wanted the chance to get back in the fighting, to shoot a riffle at the bad guys one last time. I shuddered at the thought and told myself that this was just another reason I was high tailing it out of this psychotic predicament. I gave Mike one last look before we pulled out of town. If we took a right it would lead us to the dirt highway heading towards the city, if we took a left, our destiny would be northbound instead.

“You sure this is the right thing?” I said to him only half expecting anything more than a sage nod. He was silent and still for a long moment. The road was deserted which made this choice that much easier to make. Having eyes stare down at you as you decide to become a traitor and deserter of your own homeland makes one prone to second guessing, or so I would assume.

“Way I look at it, we have two choices,” he said still looking out the window into the cornfields beyond, “We turn right, we might as well drive this truck off the next corner and smash it into the river.” He spat out the window mulling over the next choice of words. “We turn left, and at least then we have a fighting chance to still have a life after this is all over.” I looked at him, and shivered. The fact that he couldn’t make eye contact with me meant that he was still undecided what the right course of action was. We were in a lose lose situation and he knew damned well that there was no way I was going to go through with this plan without his approval.

“I suppose we better get going then,” I said as I moved the truck over to the left as I made the turn. “Hopefully Canada ain’t as cold as they say it is,” I said with an attempt of humor in my throat that failed horribly.

That first night of driving went by quickly. We had left at two in the afternoon on a Monday and now it was pushing nearly midnight. We made it half way through Kansas before I had to pull over to rest a spell. My eyes were drooping so low that I thought I would drive the truck right off the side of the road. I fell into a deep dreamless sleep that first night. I was grateful later on for that restful night, years later I would pray for a dreamless night like that again. Hell, I still do.

The next day we both woke with the birds as the sun was creeping up over the horizon. Let me tell you, there is something about the Midwestern sunrises. Maybe it’s because the states are so flat, maybe it’s because the air is so much more clearer than in the big cities or on the coast, but when you see that sunrise, it’s like having a mental enema. All thoughts cleared out of my mind as I watched the orange and purple clouds spread out from the horizon as that reddish sun rose slowly over the plains taking on a more golden sheen. I started up the engine as the sky began to lighten from its inky night to its pearly blue day time glow.

We took back to the roads early enough that by the second night we were crossing the border of Nebraska. By the second night and the third day, driving through the Midwest had become something of a zen like experience. Row upon row of corn and wheat and hay stretched out before us. Even a strong willed man would find it hard not to be hypnotized by the monotonous roads. It was in this long stretch of Midwestern farmland that time seemed to slow down to the point of nearing infinity. I once read something about some theory saying the faster you went the slower time went and that if you reach a certain point time itself could stop all together. That’s what we experienced out there. We felt life racing past us faster than we thought was possible. We went from being children to being adults in what seemed like a split second choice. And here we were, in the middle of nowhere watching time slow down.

It was the fourth day that reality finally struck us. I saw Mike looking out onto a small town we stopped in. I can’t even remember the name, something like Marlboro or Marlborough. We stopped for some sandwiches and pop and decided to stretch our legs for a few before heading for the last leg of the trip into the frozen tundra. Halfway through lunch he gave a sigh, not one of defeat or regret but one of acceptance. That was the first time I knew that this choice was final. There was no going back after this point. We were only a few hours away from the Canadian border and Mike had made it all clear with that one muffled grunt that our final destination lay beyond that border.

There were no words of wisdom to follow, just a simple nod and a half-assed smile to signify that we were not only done with this small town, but done with the country we were born in. The reality that we might never be welcomed back into our own homes hadn’t sunk in until just then, at least not for me. I wasn’t the one who had any family up north, that was Mike’s department. All my blood was south of the mason Dixon line. Until I got my numbers called out of that damned fishbowl I never dreamed of heading any further north than Tennessee. Mike on the other hand had at least one relative up there. And that was the man we were going to see.

Mike called him Uncle Jean on account that the man was French. I always had the habit of calling him with a more American-Irish accent spurting out Shawn. I remember having fun doing that as kids. It used to bug the shit out of Mike. He used to say it made me sound “uneducated”. I used to tell him he was full of shit. That usually ended with him holding me down and shoving clods of earth in my face until I screamed out Uncle Jee-awn.

Uncle Jean LePierre, owner of one of Canada’s largest coal mines. It was he was to be our savior from the battle field. This was the man who would rescue us from a life with a gun and a knife. Mike had sung praises of this man ever since we were old enough to get into fist fights. Not the kind that you bring on someone you hate, but the variety you bring on someone you love to show them just how much you care.

The week before we left he called up his uncle and worked out some kind of deal.

“Robby, I got this worked out,” he said to me that last weekend we could fully enjoy as free men, “I just need you to trust me.” Of course I trusted him, why wouldn’t I. Mike had never done me wrong, and he had gotten me out of some of the worst situations in my life. It was Mike who managed to save me from going to the prom with Norma Renklin. I might not have been the most popular kid in the class, but what was I thinking when I asked her to go? Ratty hair, greasy skin, one lazy eye, and a limp that made her look like a cripple, yup, that was Norma all right. Maybe it was pity, maybe it was cause I had gotten drink on Grain liquor the night before, but for some reason I had asked that girl to the Prom. Mike pulled me aside and nearly crushed my face in with his meaty fist. Blood poured out of my nose and mouth. That was of course after I spent three hours trying to figure out how the hell to get out of the date. It was the perfect way out. Norma never wanted to go out with me from that day on, and god bless her, that made the sore in my face not ache as much. Funny thing was, she started developing a little schoolyard crush on big Mike shortly after. I remember the matching black eye I got when I tried to hook him up with her a few weeks later.

So why wouldn’t I trust him if he told me we had a way out of this situation. A week later we were in my truck headed towards the border to start our new lives out as coal miners rather than soldiers. I figured it sounded better to be underground than in a trench getting shot at by krouts. Mike seemed to think the same thing. Of course, it wasn’t till we were about to pass through the last few miles of Montana that it really hit home. I was never coming back. It wasn’t like I was leaving behind this great opportunity at life. My family didn’t have the money to send me to some fancy college, nor did I have any particular skills that would have landed me a nice paying job. Sure I had my high school diploma, which was more than most kids my age back in Talliville could say, but it was jack shit out there in farm country.

No, it was the realization that I really had nothing to loose in crossing this border that hit home the hardest. I thought tears would be coming down my face, or that second thoughts would force me to turn us around and turn ourselves in to the first army recruitment station we passed by, but I was wrong. Instead, I felt an emptiness, a vast hole inside of me that I learned later on, would only grow in size as the years wore on. I hid this from Mike for as long as possible, but near the end I think he saw it a lot more clearly than I thought was possible.

Once that border was crossed, it only took us about a days more travel time to get into the town that housed that coal mine. Hell the town itself was the coal mine. As we neared the end of the road I looked up and noticed the sky getting darker. I figured it was just a trick of the imagination. It was still near noon, and just an hour earlier the day seemed to be almost the brightest day I had ever seen. Now, as we neared the gate leading into the closed off town, I could feel an endless night creeping over us. That second thought that had escaped me at the Montana-Canadian border reemerged with a vengeance then. Now I wish I had listened to it.

 
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Posted by on July 17, 2013 in Blog, Books

 

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New Poetry: Hindsight

Hindsightblue_eyes
I stand before you now.
A whole, a part, apart
from those I hold onto,
Separated from dreams,
And from Reality
I Stand alone gripping
My worst fears. An expansion
Before me, and expanse behind.
If only I could have
Vision twenty-twenty
Hind-sight. The blurred image
Of the past reminds me
What I left behind, the
Life mediocrity,
My fear to explore this
Unknown. What if there is
No-one on the other
Side of this endeavor?
What if all I left behind
Is gone for good? Tell me,
Will this forever caste me
As a new being, to
Never be recognized
By ones I used to love.
That they might see my
Success as betrayal.
I feel cold blue eyes,
Color of winter ice
Bore into my vision.
My current footing, held
Fast in what I regret.
What is truth, what is lie?
The fear of truth upon
Falsity is far too
Strong for me to bear on
This journey that I heed.
Darkness ahead makes me
Delay, makes me doubtful
I can actually take that
First step. The icy eyes
They stare at me like stars
Long dead, yet still shining
Their prophetic warnings.
I warn you now, dear friends
Do not stare into them
For too long, you may find
Your path clouded as well.
Thus is my journey not yet
Begun, for fear of what
Lies beyond, what lies ahead.
I have been the first to
Venture farther from the
Safety of the nest I
Call home, yet there is
More for me to explore.
I must steer away from
Those eyes of regret
Those eyes of hindsight and
The veil that they cast
Of wrong turns and choices
Ill made. I take that step.

 
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Posted by on July 16, 2013 in Art, Blog, Poetry

 

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PODCAST: The Devil’s Advocates – Episode 5 NOW AVAILABLE!

Hello Friends and Fans! Episode 5 of the greatest Podcast never listened to has been released!


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Once again, we are here to disrupt your eardrums with our rambling nonsense. Join us for our journey through history! Last episode we touched on PRISM & NSA, this time we explore the world of ELECTRICITY with our friends Tesla, Edison and…Ben Franklin.
This episode contains:

  • Time Traveling Inventors
  • Electrocuted Orangutans
  • What a Delorian is really made of
  • Why Thomas Edison is a Prick
  • And Mittens Dies

Also, please LIKE US on our Facebook Page! Every Like Saves A Child! Or something. Actually It probably does nothing, but you never know.

Enjoy The Devil’s Advocates Today!


 
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Posted by on July 16, 2013 in Blog, Podcast

 

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